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Get out of my way!

First publishedin World Highways
March 2018
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Our Skidmarks page is highly rated by readers. Your input could help make this page even more entertaining. If you come across any amusing road-related stories or pictures email me at mwoof@ropl.com


BEE CAREFUL
A motorcycle owner had to take unusual measures recently when he returned to his bike to find it swarming with bees. A bee specialist was called who used a smoke device and a portable hive to remove the insects safely. It is still unclear why the bees swarmed around the motorcycle. Smelling of oil and fuel, the bike would be hard for a bee to mistake for the pollen of a flowering plant.

GET OUT OF MY WAY!
Paramedics responding to a serious medical emergency in the UK said that they were disgusted when they returned to their ambulance to find a note attached to the windscreen. The note complained that the vehicle had blocked a driveway, preventing a person from moving a car. The paramedics received praise for their efforts in saving the life of someone who had been taken seriously ill, while criticisms were aimed at the selfishness of the unnamed complainant who wrote the note. The writer later admitted his shame in posting the note, having been widely castigated for the incident.

PARKING PROBLEMS
A driver in the German city of Frankfurt has been reunited with the car he parked some 20 years ago. The man left his car and when he wanted to return home, was unable to locate it. After looking for the vehicle for some time he reported it to the police as being stolen. However 20 years later the car has now been found, where it had been parked by the man. But instead of being stolen he had simply forgotten where it was. He had left the car in the parking area of an industrial building where it was discovered recently by a demolition crew, who intended to knock down the now disused structure. The car was in the way of the demolition workers so they contacted the police to try and find out the owner. The owner, now retired, travelled to the site with his daughter to identify the missing car. However the vehicle was no longer roadworthy and had to be scrapped. It is not clear how the insurance company responded to this news.

BRIDGE VISITOR
The famous Sydney Harbour Bridge in Australia recently saw a rather unusual user. Police pursued a wallaby that crossed the bridge in leaps and bounds recently. After a number of attempts, police officers were able to detain the animal. It was distressed at the experience and was taken into temporary custody while its minor injuries were treated, before being released into the bush outside of the city. Officers commented that wallabies are a frequent sight in Sydney’s suburban areas but are luckily rather less common in the centre of the city. They added too that this animal was lucky to have chosen to make its crossing early in the morning before traffic had built up as otherwise the story might have had a less than happy ending.
 
DIRTY PROTEST
A cyclist in the UK is alleged to have protested against a
motorist who sounded the horn of his vehicle in a rather unusual, and disgusting, fashion. Questions remain following the incident. According to the motorist, the cyclist excreted into his own hands and then threw this at the vehicle’s windscreen. The motorist said that he had sounded his horn because the cyclist was riding ‘scarily’. Exactly how long it took for the incident between the two to develop in such a fashion has been unexplained. Quite how the motorist was scared by the cyclist has not been revealed and nor has the cyclist stepped forward to explain his version of the incident.

GETTING HIGH
A Nissan driver in the US recently discovered that the vehicle could be made to ‘catch air’ for short periods. After the driver lost control at speed, the Nissan Altima hit a central reservation and bounced into the air, becoming wedged into the upper storey of a building housing a dentist’s office in California. The driver was able to get out of the vehicle without assistance but emergency workers had to free the other occupant of the car. Subsequent reports suggest that the driver was high on drugs prior to making the vehicle airborne.

FASTER?
In the UK a young mother hit speeds of up to 190km/h (120mph) while being pursued along a stretch of motorway. She had been driving a number of her friends home following a party but was spotted by officers in a police patrol car when she sped past their vehicle at excessive speed. Realising that she was now being pursued she opted to drive faster and when she diverted onto minor roads, raced through several red lights and into oncoming traffic, before veering back onto the motorway. Several more police cars joined the pursuit, which only ended when the engine of her VW exploded. Although she ran away from her car she was quickly caught and arrested. She was jailed for 12 months and also collected a series of penalty points on her licence for the offence. She did not explain her behaviour and nor were officers able to understand as the vehicle, though uninsured, was her own and she was not engaged in any criminal activity other than her appalling standard of driving.

NUTS ABOUT VWS
A VW Golf owner in the UK returned from a five-week vacation in Asia with his girlfriend to find that his car was not running properly. The gear change was very stiff and the car struggled to start. He took the vehicle to a garage for repairs and before he left, opened the glove compartment to find that it was packed full of acorns. Surprised at this revelation, the owner and garage mechanics quickly inspected the vehicle, only to discover that it had been used as food store by hibernating squirrels. Highly amused, the mechanics charged the man for removing the acorns from the car’s engine compartment and gearbox linkage, as well as removing a dead rat from the engine bay. The man explained that he was sorry that the squirrels’ attempt to turn the car into a nut store had been fruitless.

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